Shared Lives - Archie's story

Shared Lives carers Patricia and Alistair support a young man called Archie. Annabel is Archie’s mum and she told us about the difference Shared Lives has made to them as a family:

“As parents of two young people with complex additional needs, the future was always very scary and overwhelming. We have spent years worrying about what our boys’ futures will look like. Will they ever have the chance to gain independence and find their place in the world as others have the chance to do if they want to? We live in the middle of nowhere with no accessible public transport or shops. Options are few and far between and the future looked bleak and depressing.

Olly works away during the week and I was looking after both boys practically as a single parent which was exhausting and stressful. I could not give enough time to either of them and I could see that Archie was frustrated at home, needed to get away and develop his independence and social skills. This was not going to happen at home.

We had heard about the Shared Lives scheme but knew that getting a suitable placement was like finding hen’s teeth, so did not hold out much hope. The alternative of Archie living in shared accommodation with carers coming in to support him felt like too big a step for Archie and for us. However, we were at the mercy of the system. So, to find a Shared Lives placement for Archie with Tricia and Alistair Paterson has been beyond incredible.

Archie is so happy with them. He is busy – with college, clubs, learning independence and living skills, and he has a better social life than we do! He now lives in an area where he can practice his independence skills, access buses and shops, and is only a short distance from college. Tricia and Alistair are so much more than just carers…they obviously really care about him, and they have a great relationship with him. Furthermore, they really include him with everything they do, give him opportunities we could never provide and make him feel valued. We have seen his confidence and sense of self grow over the last few months, and that is entirely down to them.  

Our lives are far less stressful. Knowing that Archie is living such a happy and fulfilled life means that we can focus on his younger brother’s needs now. We also have more time to spend with their older sister who has missed out as looking after two boys with complex needs has taken up so much of our time, energy and patience. Archie comes home regularly and knows he can see us whenever he wants, however we are increasingly finding that he doesn’t want to come home for long. He just wants to touch base and can’t wait to get back to his other home, with the Patersons."

You can watch an interview with Patricia and Alistair here.

To find out more about becoming a Shared Lives carer like Patricia and Alistair you can contact the team at [email protected]

To read more stories like Patricia and Alistair's you can go here. 

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